Album #1

But Not Gagged
Released 2/26/13
©2005-2017 Bradley Voorhees
1) Unknown [Quadrant 4] (Intro)/Drift
2) The Stars are Falling
3) The Key (Houdini)
4) The Crucible and the Chaff
5) Round and Round
6) Hidden [Quadrant 2]
7) Blind Spot [Quadrant 3]

SCARED OF THIS
Verse 1:
I can feel this deep in my soul.
I don't wanna be afraid to scream.
I can feel this. No one can know.
God knows I just wanted to be loved.

Hook:
Can you hear me? Can you feel this in me?
Can you hear me? Can you feel this in me?

Pre-Chorus:
Pull my world apart as my head hangs low.
Crash upon the ground, and my love should flow.

Chorus:
Oh Are you afraid of this 'Cause I could run from this.
Oh, I could lie or I could die. I don't have to stay today.
Are you afraid of this? 'Cause I am scared of this.
You could pull me apart, explode deep in my heart.
And I'm scared of this.

Verse 2:
I can feel this. Where should I go?
Everywhere leads me back to here.
I can feel this. No one can know.
I'm still surrounded in my fear.

Hook:
Can you hear me? Can you feel this in me?
Can you hear me? Can you feel this in me?

Pre-Chorus:
Pull my world apart as my head hangs low.
Crash upon the ground and, my love should flow.

Chorus:
Oh Are you afraid of this 'Cause I could run from this.
Oh, I could lie or I could die. I don't have to stay today.
Are you afraid of this? 'Cause I am scared of this.
You could pull me apart, explode deep in my heart.
And I'm scared of this.

Chorus 2:
Are you afraid of this? Why did it come to this?
Oh, I would lie and I would die. I don't have to stay today.
Are you afraid of this, 'Cause I'm still scared of this.
I let you pull me apart, explode deep in my heart.
And I'm scared of this.

HIDDEN [QUADRANT 2]
Verse 1:
I've got a man who lives inside me.
He stays hidden all the time.
He is just a little part of me,
but I would say that I am not inclined
to let him out, but baby, this is a special day
because you pushed me past my limit.
Now you're gonna see him, but you won't know he's there
until you're neck deep...neck deep in it.

Chorus:
He's gonna murder you with his smile
He's gonna murder you with his smile
He's gonna murder you murder you murder you murder you
murder you with his smile
He's gonna murder you with his smile
He's gonna murder you with his smile
He's gonna murder you murder you murder you murder you
murder you with his smile

Verse 2:
You won't know what's happening 'til you wake up in your blood,
and he's smiling down at you like the Great Flood

1/2 Chorus:
He's gonna murder you with his smile
He's gonna murder you with his smile
He's gonna murder you murder you murder you murder you
murder you with his smile

Bridge:
I know, baby, it seems so far to go,
but he's zero to 90, straight to Death Row.
Every moment he's in there, pulsing through my veins,
and though he takes control of me,
I still don't know his name

Chorus:
He's gonna murder you with his smile
He's gonna murder you with his smile
He's gonna murder you murder you murder you murder you
murder you with his smile
He's gonna murder you with his smile
He's gonna murder you with his smile
He's gonna murder you murder you murder you murder you
murder you with his smile

THE CRUCIBLE AND THE CHAFF
|=|:
I'm feeling trapped and held back.
I'm feeling the cold attack
of the world that I'm in.
If I could break my way out,
whether it's with or without
absolution of my sins.
And even though I'm stuck here,
it's not the dark that I fear:
it is the silence of my voice.
So this is my new home now,
a crucible of self-doubt,
but I do have a choice.

Hook 1:
Though I am paralyzed,
I am not mute.
I'm bound, but I'm not gagged,
and that's why I'm singing to you.

|=|:
The barbs of heartache wrap tight.
Not saying that it is right
or easy to remove.
And when I get my strength up,
will that be enough
to make it through? Oh

|=|:
Then when the crucible breaks,
my catatonic state
is finally repealed.
Am I still at the mercy
of the world around me?
My prison is revealed.

|=|:
The whirlwinds all blow me
like chaff. I am only
bound in another way.
Bound by my forced movement.
Is this really improvement
from being forced to stay?

Hook 2:
Though I am pushed both here and there,
I am not mute.
Still bound and still not gagged,
I'll keep singing out to you!

|=|:
But my heavy words
will tether me to the earth,
and I'll have control.
Then I'll be my own man
who moves his own hands
with his own soul. Oh...

BLIND SPOT [QUADRANT 3]
You saw in me something I did not.
You saw into my blind spot...

There it was,
the light that flickered up
that you saw but that I could not.
You said I was everything you'd hoped for,
but I know there never could be more.
You saw in me something I did not.
You saw into my blind spot.

LIEBESLIED
Chorus:
Don't smile; it only crumbles me.
Don't laugh; it only sets me free.
Don't weep, 'cause I can't let you frown.
And I won't let you go...not this time around.
And you know that it can be tough,
but can you say that it would be enough
just to stay all alone?

Verse 1:
I guess that Its been mesmerized
by you now for quite some time.
I hope you realize that I care.
Your smile pushes through the bleakest of days
like a light cutting through the haze.
I wish that you would say that you need me

Chorus:
Don't smile; it only crumbles me.
Don't laugh; it only sets me free.
Don't weep, 'cause I can't let you frown.
And I won't let you go...not this time around.
And you know that it can be tough,
but can you say that it would be enough
just to stay all alone?

Verse 2:
I know that you've been hurt before.
You don't want love anymore.
You're waiting for something that feels better.
I'll be here waiting for you,
and when you're finally through
mourning, you can come to me.

Chorus:
Don't smile; it only crumbles me.
Don't laugh; it only sets me free.
Don't weep, 'cause I can't let you frown.
And I won't let you go...not this time around.
And you know that it can be tough,
but can you say that it would be enough
just to stay all alone?

Chorus:
Don't smile; it only crumbles me.
Don't laugh; it only sets me free.
Don't weep, 'cause I can't let you frown.
And I won't let you go...not this time around.
And you know that it can be tough,
but can you say that it would be enough
just to stay all alone?

TRIPPING OVER NOTHING
Verse 1:
Every time I see you, I end up on the floor.
It's not like I'm distracted or running into doors.
You just affect me, and I can't say how or why.
But dammit, darling, you make me lose control when I see your eyes.

Chorus:
I'm turned around. I'm falling down.
I'm spinning 'round and 'round.
I'm slipping up. I can't get up.
I'm tripping over nothing.

Verse 2:
I see your face. Big mistake!
I start to go all numb.
You smile at me, set my body free.
From there on out, I'm done.
I start to reel when I start to feel
the closeness of your heat.
I lose my ground and thus fall down,
before our bodies even meet.

Chorus:
I'm turned around. I'm falling down.
I'm spinning 'round and 'round.
I'm slipping up. I can't get up.
I'm tripping over nothing.

Bridge:
My legs grow tired.
My feet grow numb.
When you're around,
I feel like I'm falling on and on,
down into an abyss.
But I kinda like it like this
here with you.

Chorus:
I'm turned around. I'm falling down.
I'm spinning 'round and 'round.
I'm slipping up. I can't get up.
I'm tripping over nothing.

OPEN [QUADRANT 1]
|=|
I am open to the light
But I am partial to the night.
Unwrapped of all those things
that serve to tangle me.

|=| Where do I fit in?
And how do I begin
to live outside the shell
of my mind?

|=|
well you've seen me cry.
Well, we both know why...
It's because I've shared.
I've left myself so bare,
and not a single soul seems to care...

DOUBLE EXPOSURE
Verse 1:
I exposed myself to you
and gave you every chance to see my secrets.
and you just refused to value
me even a fraction of what I valued you

Chorus 1:
you know I'm not the one
who held all of the grudges
when everything went sour.
And I need to know if you want to love me
or if you would rather let me go.

Verse 2:
So just think for a sec. about our pains.
I'm sure that we both caused equal share.
So can't you just forget,
or at least forgive me of our many, many wrongs?

Chorus 2:
Well you know I'm not the one
who held all of the grudges
when everything went sour.
And I need to know if you want to love me
or if you would rather let me go.

Chorus 2:
Well you know I'm not the one
who held all of the grudges
when everything went sour.
And I need to know if you want to love me
or if you would rather let me go.

ROUND AND ROUND
Verse 1:
I feel the wind pick up.
Haven't we had enough?
Or shall we let it call all the shots,
Well I know that once we were happy...
or so I've heard.
But this cycle of pain's now all we've got.

Hook 1:
It picks us up.
Can we take that much?
I guess it doesn't matter
'cause I can't run.
Well, I see the spin
I use to keep me in.
It's 'lose-lose,' baby...
there's no way for me to win.

Chorus:
We leave destruction in our wake.
(Round and round and...)
We've got too much at stake.
(Round and round and...)
It's so hard to shake ourselves free.
(Round and round and...)
I don't know what to say.
(Round and round and...)
I try to run away...
(Round and round and...)
But fear is a boomerang returning me.
(Round and round and...)

Verse 2:
Tossed up in the air,
broken earth everywhere.
How'd we manage to stand for so long
on solid ground?
When the storm passes by,
will you still want to try?
Will it be the end
or will we be safe and sound?

Hook 2:
It picked us up.
Can we take that much?
I guess it doesn't matter
'cause you won't run.
Well, I see the spin
You use to keep you in.
It's 'lose-lose,' baby...
there's no way for us to win.

Chorus:
We leave destruction in our wake.
(Round and round and...)
We've got too much at stake.
(Round and round and...)
It's so hard to shake ourselves free.
(Round and round and...)
I don't know what to say.
(Round and round and...)
I try to run away...
(Round and round and...)
But fear is a boomerang returning me.
(Round and round and...)

Bridge:
I wanna make it
(Round and round and...)
so I don't have to fake it, baby.
(Round and round and...)
And will this storm go shaking
(Round and round and...)
(Round and round and...)
everything apart?

Round and round and...
Round and round and...
Round and round and...
Round and round and...

BLACKOUT
He forgot my name
because he lost his brain,
but it's all the same
because he's caught in a blackout.
I feel so sad.
I could never live like that,
but it's just too bad
because he's caught in a blackout.

Oh! Oh!

I know a way that I can get out of this mess,
but I wonder when I will learn how to forget.

All the world seems to think
that my pain is just their game,
but I'm not one of those guys
who wants to feel afraid... -

Oh! Oh!

I saw the dark
around me growing.
I wanted to be
a pin of light in that blackness showing.

And all the world's a stage,
or so Its heard.
I'd love to say that It cliche,
but I forgot the words.
And all the heart inside of me comes spilling out.
I wish that I could stay away from blackouts.

UNKNOWN [QUADRANT 4]/DRIFT

Verse 1:
I watched the bay
getting flooded by rain.
You ran away.
I was never the same,
and I..

Hook 1:
I had to find a way to live.

Chorus 1:
'Cause I feel like I'm wrong,
but I only sang my songs.
And I simply cannot believe
that you offered me no reprieve.
And so it drifts away.

Verse 2:
I walked the pier,
my collar gripped by fear.
I saw the waves
eroding down the ways
we lived.

Hook 1:
I had to find a way to live.

Chorus 2:
'Cause I feel like I'm wrong,
but I only sang my songs.
And I simply cannot believe
that you offered me no reprieve.
And so it drifts away.

Bridge:
The storm around me, it swells.
I know now that I have failed.
Because I cannot be alone.
And now I'm over now that you're gone.

Verse 3:
I saw the lights
illuminate my plight
as I slowly fell.
At least the storm was quelled.

Well, I...

Hook 2:
I guess I never found a way.... -

Chorus 3:
'Cause I know I was wrong,
and I should've done more than sing songs.
And you were right not to believe
in me and offer no reprieve.
And so it drifts...
And so it drifts...
And so I drift away.

A MILLION FIRES
Verse 1:
I'm bobbing up and down.
I'm not making a sound.
Did you know that it's silent
when somebody drowns?
Like me.
Like me.
Like me.
After all these years,
to end up in tears...
Well, now I feel like I've wasted
my youth because of fear
that I couldn't control...
'cause I didn't know...
I didn't know Chorus 1:
That my dreams are like a million stars.
They seem so close, and yet they're far
from where I need them to be.
And my dreams are like a million fires.
They burn so hot and then expire.
But not before they consume me in their ire.

Verse 2:
I couldn't leave the dark
to see where the spark is.
I couldn't make my way back
to 'home, where the heart is'...
This time.
This time.
This time.

Chorus 2:
And my dreams are like a million stars.
They seem so close, and yet they're far
from where I need them to be.
And my dreams are like a million fires.
They burn so hot and then expire.
But not before they consume me in their ire.

Bridge:
How long should I struggle
with unrealized dreams
before I give up on them
and start driving the city streets
to my corporate job
that drains
my creativity?

Chorus 2:
And my dreams are like a million stars.
They seem so close, and yet they're far
from where I need them to be.
And my dreams are like a million fires.
They burn so hot and then expire.
But not before they consume me in their ire.

And my dreams are like a million stars
that burn so hot just like a million fires.
And they consume me and fill me with their ire.

Verse 1:
I'm bobbing up and down.
I'm not making a sound.
Did you know that it's silent
when somebody drowns?
Like me.
Like me.
Like me.

THE KEY (HOUDINI)
Verse 1:
I am standing here in my cell.
Is it any wonder it's getting hard to tell
if I am Houdini or if I am a fraud?
Do I know how to escape at all?

Chorus:
The key is here.
It's hidden in my mouth.
I have to make it clear:
that's how I'll make it out.
And when I escape,
I'll escape with my life.
And then I'll use the key
to set everything right.

Oh

Verse 2:
I am hanging. I'm dangling upside-down.
As the water rises in the tank, I'm bound.
My hands are strapped behind me.
The buckles are all locked tight.
All I need is a key tonight.

Chorus:
The key is here.
It's hidden in my mouth.
I have to make it clear:
that's how I'll make it out.
And when I escape,
I'll escape with my life.
And then I'll use the key
to set everything right.

Oh

Bridge:
With the key in hand,
the sun shines bright.
To find myself out of the binds
was well worth the fight.
And so I pray that I will stay inside the light.
And you will say that using the key was right.

Oh

End:
The key! The key! The key! (Houdini!)
The key! The key! The key! (Houdini!)
The key! The key! The key! (Houdini!)
The key! The key! The key! (Houdini!)

THE STARS ARE FALLING
Verse 1:
I stand resolved
in the face of scurrilous winds
where your distance and indifference
both live.
I tried my hand at
doing things on my own.
Then I realized
that I was just standing all alone.

Chorus 1:
So when I wake up
in the middle of the night
to find the stars are falling
down on you and I,
I'll do my best
not to look at you and sigh.
But you know
I'm not the strongest guy.
Well, you know
I'm not the strongest guy.

Verse 2:
Standing beside you, babe,
I should be feeling good.
But I am confused,
and I know that I'm misunderstood.
Why must you always
make me into the enemy?
I've done everything for you,
bent over backwards and still
you want to punish me.

Chorus 2:
So when I wake up
in the middle of the night
to find the stars are falling
down on you and I,
I'll do my best
not to think of you and cry.
But you know
I'm not the strongest guy.
Well, you know
I'm not the strongest guy.

Bridge:
I don't know where I'll go
when all is said and done,
though my parents and
my religion tell me I should.
I guess there's something
to be said about having faith.
But it's been shaken all my life,
and now I've lost it
in God and religion, too.

Chorus 3:
So when I wake up
in the middle of the night
to find the stars are falling
down on you and I,
I'll do my best
not to lay down and die.
But you know
I'm not the strongest guy.
Well, you know I'm not...
Well, you know I'm not...
yes, you know
I'm not the strongest guy.

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